Mt. Moriah. That dreaded place of uncertainty. That place of no return where death cringes up the spine. Nothing good can come from it. The Lord tells me to kill that very thing that I hold dear. That very child that He gave me! What kind of God is this? What kind of Cosmic King tells a parent to kill his son, the son that He gave to the Father? This child means more to me than anything in the world! And Mt. Moriah is dangerous. It’s nothing but desert land and crazy pagans. No, I will not take my child to Mt. Moriah and sacrifice him. God, you gave me this child! How can you expect me to kill him? Why are you so quiet now, God? You tell me to sacrifice him as an offering and now you just remain quiet? But life continues to decline. My greatest fears have become a reality. The very nightmares awaken to the world. I can feel my knees begin to drop. Fine, I will go. Trying not to say too much, my son and I leave the next morning. We began our journey enjoying one another’s company. We laughed and hugged, and then I cried. I could barely sleep. Most of the time I spent crying knowing what was to become of him. Finally, the day came. As the weight of the world seemed to crush me, I could hear my heart beating the whole way up the mountain. This can’t be happening! This must be a dream! Please wake up! Before I knew it, my child lay on the altar. Speechless, he looked at me with despair. No words could describe that moment. What kind of Father am I? How could I be so crazy to kill my own son? This is my son, but God said to do this. No, no, no, no! As I reluctantly grabbed my knife, my son begins to cry. And then I begin to cry. I’m sorry son, God told me I must do this. I can barely see now as my eyes are filled with tears. My knife reaches up to begin the process…no…no…no…NO….
“God let the suffering old man go through with it up to the point where He knew there could be no retreat, and then forbade him to lay a hand upon the boy. To the wondering patriarch He now says in effect, ‘It’s alright right…I never intended that you should actually slay the lad. I only wanted to remove him from the temple of your heart so that I might reign unchallenged there. I wanted to correct the perversion that existed in your love. Now you may have the boy sound and well…Now I know you fear God, seeing that you have not withheld your son, your only son, from me.”-A.W. Tozer (The Pursuit of God)
My life during this past year plus has been Abrahams story to Mt. Moriah found in Genesis 22. For me, and most of us, God has called us to sacrifice our dreams and ambitions. My mom told me a couple weeks ago about my sister who died when she was six weeks old. My mom said she heard God audibly tell her that He was going to take Nicole. For my mom, she has had to suffer in literally letting go of the child she loved so much. Others have the same story. Others still have their dreams and ambitions that they must sacrifice. For me, it has been my dream of wanting to be in full-time ministry and finding my future wife. And by full-time ministry I mean discipling people and being a pastor. And while Pastor John Bowers has said that full-time ministry is being obedient to the Holy Spirit at all times, I know that I am supposed to be involved in pastoring people in the church. Not only that are my dreams to get my Masters and Doctorate, to be a church planter, to build a missions sending base, and maybe even start my own bible college; and that’s just the beginning.
However, God has me in a season of transition right now. In a season of Moriah as I will call it. A time when God is calling me to just be obedient to Him and learn to be content in every situation (which is really challenging my tattoo; Philippians 4:13 [you must read it in context; no you won’t fly by believing in Jesus]). I think many of those who read this post can identify with me. Whether you graduated in the spring, are about to graduate, or you are an adult reading this. We all know these times of transition, and blatantly, heartache. We don’t want to let go of things because we know they are of God– but even what God blesses us with can become an idol.
My point is this, more than likely you have something that is blocking you from a closer relationship with God. For me, it has been finding my future wife and my dreams and ambitions for the future. For you, it may be something completely different. By seek out the answer from the Holy Spirit. It may be something you didn’t even realize! What is something you can’t go a day without thinking about? Does it distract you from your time with the Lord? It may be an idol.
For those of you reading this who also read my Silly Bandz: An Epoch of American Society post, yes, I do have a thing about idols. It has ALWAYS been an issue with God’s people and it continues to wreak havoc today. The Lord has laid this on my heart and I know I am called to preach against them and bring idols into the Light.
“The old man of God lifted his head to respond to the Voice, and stood there on the mount strong and pure and grand, a man marked out by the Lord for special treatment, a friend and favorite of the Most High…It hurt cruelly, but it was effective.” –A.W. Tozer (The Pursuit of God)
