In 2005-06 I was in a band called So Help Me God. We were a local band, but most importantly we were a couple of dudes who loved to jam and loved the Lord. We wrote a couple of different songs. One song in particular was the above title. It’s a pretty brootal (that’s awesome in the Metal music world) title if I do say myself. I’m pretty sure Jesse Dague came up with it.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will most definitely hurt you. Coming from a family who didn’t have many roots in my school, with a last name of Boothby, wearing glasses, being a Christian, and always seeming to say the wrong things at the wrong time left me with a past of bullying and hurt. Let me be completely honest with you, people would call me “Booby” in school and the teachers didn’t care. They would say, “Sticks and Stones…” blah blah blah LIAR! That phrase left me and other kids like me feeling hopeless that bullying would never end. The reason? Because the “bad kids” just had bad home lives and shouldn’t get disciplined and the “popular kids” had parents the teachers didn’t want to deal with. There were days when I came home crying my eyes out because of how badly people treated me. I don’t really remember the days I got tackled playing football in the field (except one where my button down pants came undone and I was laying in a field with only my boxers showing in front of the whole elementary school), but I do remember the hurtful words people said to me.
Renew is in a new series called Reversing Darwin. This series takes us through the labels and categories in life and explains how Jesus came to destroy these things we know as racism, bullying, etc. Teenagers are cruel. Don’t believe me? Talk to some of the students in my youth ministry. The things I’ve heard them say make me want to cry for them now. How can we overcome these things? For me, I’ve wondered, “what words can I tell these kids now that I wish I heard when I was their age?”
Paul says, “We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character; and character hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” Romans 5:3-5
I can honestly sit here before you today and say I am a better man today because I was bullied a lot. That doesn’t mean bullying is okay or right, but in their persecution against me for my last name, glasses, and Christianity, I came out a better man. I have a better understanding of how hurtful bullying is and how words can hurt you. Because I was treated poorly, I know how I should and shouldn’t treat other people. I should treat people with/as
-Respect
-Honor
-Dignity
-Valuable
-God’s Creation
When I was in Florida I walked into a grocery store on a regular school night, not anticipating anything out of the ordinary to happen. As I walked up to the door to the left of me outside was a man sitting there asking for help. I asked him what he needed and grabbed him a couple of things. When I came back out, I didn’t throw the things at him, and I didn’t just leave him. I gave him his things and sat next to him. I listened to him. His name was brad, he was originally from Baltimore and after a series of unfortunate events, Brad ended up homeless in Lakeland. I must have sat with him for over 45 minutes just listening to him.
I continued to talk with Brad during the next couple of months. One Sunday I went to pick him up for Easter but he wasn’t at his normal spot. When I saw him on my way back, I pulled over immediately to talk with him. He asked me, “Justin, what are you doing here? Why aren’t you with your family?” I looked him straight in the eyes and said, “Brad, today, you are my family.” I could see the tears bubble up as he hesitated to hug me because he hadn’t showered in days. I simply put my arms around him and showed him how much I cared about him.
This story was not meant to show me off. This wasn’t about me. This was about Brad. This was about Jesus. This was about how each one of us should be caring for people around us. Homeless people and others in need aren’t vending machines you put some money in to feel better about yourself. They are people like you and me who just need to be treated like they matter and have a purpose. What would life look like if we stopped labeling people? What would this world look like if we began helping just one person a day? Maybe it’s the kid who’s made fun of all the time or is always depressed? Maybe it’s the popular kid who in reality has low self-esteem issues? Maybe it’s the homeless person you see all the time but are too afraid to talk to? Whatever it is, it starts with you. Change will never start with others, it must always start with you
This blog wasn’t about bullying. This blog is about treating people with value, just like Jesus treated people with value. Whether is was Matthew and the tax collectors (Matthew 9:9-12), the “sinners” Jesus had dinner with (Mark 2:15), or the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4), Jesus treated everyone with respect and value. If we had no value to God, what reason would He have to save us? On the contrary, Jesus loves us. Are you ready to love Him and show other’s His love for you?
Some verses that always help me are from Life In Your Way’s song “Induction” and “Who I am” Check it out:
